Posts Tagged ‘Privilege’
The Sex
Penetrative sex is really boring.
Honestly, I’ve felt this way since before I lost my virginity at seventeen. There is nothing appealing about the act at all. Sure, it could be nice, in theory, but everything that goes along with it is beyond repulsive.
The big chase to woo the woman, the right things to say, the right things to wear, all this trivial, material, bullshit just for a few seconds or minutes of pleasure. No thanks. I’d rather talk about books over a cup of coffee or spend an evening with a wonderful lady and a pile of records or a movie.
I know I can get off, but I have a really hard time doing so unless the circumstances are just right. I have to respect the woman, I have to care about her mind and her body. I have to feel like, at least in some other parallel dimension where women aren’t treated like objects from the moment the doctor says “it’s a girl!,” I have not manipulated or used my privilege as a male to take over or control them. Unless they like that.
I can love a woman, I can be psychically attracted to them, but I can’t make love to them in a hetronormative manner. Apparently, according to a former girlfriend and others, this makes me asexual. If that is a label that works for people, fine.
On this blog I will discuss my thoughts and feelings about my own sexuality, gender issues, and my thoughts on being a survivor of sexual assault and how that has made me the person I am today.
My name, duh, isn’t Dale Nixon. I borrowed it from Black Flag.
